I found a fantastic story that sums up my dislike for ‘modern art’ on the BBC the other day. Personally, I think the cleaner should have been commended.
Whenever a discussion comes round to modern art I retell the story of when I went to our local art exhibition during my GCSE Art course (all my friends and family must be thoroughly bored of the story by now). I swear there was a piece on the wall entitled Black with Blue Border that consisted of, that’s right, a black canvas with a 1-inch blue border around it. That’s not art, that’s something anyone with a ruler and 10 mins can create. Another consisted of a black canvas, with a stainless steel rectangle of identical size above and a small ‘hinge’ looking strip connecting the two entitled, wait for it, Ink Pad. I spotted another one, who’s title escapes me, from the 1920s (IIRC) that was a black canvas with the outline of a roughly drawn orange circle on it, as if that wasn’t enough, there were signs of where they painted over another circle.
Now, these were in an art gallery, someone had created them, someone had either commissioned or bought them, and no doubt there are critics who loved them, well, I’m here to tell you that art critics no nothing, because I can say, categorically, they weren’t art, they were crap.
Lee Penney, Real Art Critic